Saturday, December 11, 2010

Thankful

Our brother-in-law returned from his second tour in Afghanistan on Wednesday.  Since his return, he has been at a base in Florida and was supposed to arrive home today.  BUT, as luck would have it, we are having a good old fashioned blizzard today (ahem, 2 feet of the dreaded white stuff), so the poor guy is stuck in an airport in Florida.  Even though he is safe, I know we will all feel better when he steps off his plane in Minnesota and is truly home.
He has been gone for so long and we have all been very worried about him.  For me, this type of anxiety/worry almost feels, at times, like it takes my breath away. I know it is odd (and proves I need some type of therapy), but I have been almost afraid to say his name out loud while he was gone; worried it would jinx him in some strange way.  If I utter his name or my worries out loud, it makes them real.  Strange and dysfunctional....yep, but that's how I dealt with the craziness that swirls around in my head each day.  I am now also feeling guilty for being relieved that he is home, when so many soldier remain in harms way.  I know....I am a lost cause. I may as well just start blocking out weeks at a time for therapy.
After he returns home, he will have some time off then return to his other "not so safe" career doing police work.

Blessings, Tracy

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